I’m just useless today… it’s been a real tough week-end for me, as I got to say my final goodbyes to my dad.
Food wise, I’ve been extremely bad all week-end, starting Friday… In fact, you are looking at the healthiest meal I’ve had in 3 days! I mean seriously, I’ve had ice cream for breakfast on Sunday morning.
If it was only that, it wouldn’t be so bad, but the thing is, I’ve also had ice cream as a late night snack on Saturday, and ice cream for lunch on Friday. Plus, I must’ve eaten the equivalent of at least half a dozen brownies for supper on Saturday.
Did anyone say emotional eating? I was the very definition of it all week-end long. I needed comforting and found it in junk food.
For real, I couldn’t bring myself to eat anything but sugar or fat. I felt like a drunk who couldn’t stop himself from having that “one last drink”, even though they knew they’d had way more than enough already. I guess that was my way of dealing with saying goodbye to my dad. Looks like I didn’t handle it very well. 
Do I need to tell you I feel like total crap now? And guilty? And ashamed?
I guess this whole cremation / funeral thing has put a lot more stress on me than I had initially imagined it would, but now that it’s behind me, I hope I can resume eating normal food and feeling great about myself again.
Looking at this hamburger, I’d say there’s still hope for me…
You see, for some reason, besides sugar and fat, one of the things that I’d really been craving all week-end is beef, in the form of a big, juicy hamburger. So I decided that I would give in to that insane request from my brain gone mad too, but that I would at least try and make that one somewhat healthy.
I had made healthy hamburgers in the past, but I remembered the meat mixture being so moist that I knew it wouldn’t hold together well enough to be cooked on the grill. And of course, I wanted my hamburger to be cooked on the grill!
No problemo! I only needed to come up with a new recipe.
Since I had no beef in the house, I had to pay a visit to the closest grocery store (which is more like a convenience store, really) to get some, as well as some hamburger buns. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any “fancy” bread, so whole wheat was out of the question… I ended up having to buy plain, white kaisers.
I also got to give Nora’s Crispy Sweet Potato Fries another go! I got much better results this time, the fries were nice and crispy, but since I was a bit short on time, I didn’t manage to give them the complete cooking / drying time that they needed… so I guess they could’ve been even crispier still.
Looks like I will have to give them a third try and REALLY plan ahead, this time. I need to keep in mind that I need AT LEAST an hour and a half to make these babies. Hey, you know what they say: third time’s the charm!
As for the hamburger? It was just what the doctor ordered. My brain didn’t even realise that I had pulled a prank on it and served it a healthy version of the junk food that it was badly craving.
Now I really have to get busy and start working on healthy sweets, in preparation for the next crisis…
Hey, you never know when it’ll hit next!
INGREDIENTS
(yields 4 patties)
- 600g Top Sirloin Beef
- 1 egg
- 1/3 cup whole wheat bread crumbs
- 1 tsp salted herbs
- ½ tsp black pepper
- ½ tsp salt
- ½ tsp Sambal Oelek
- 2 tbsp dried parsley
- 1 tsp marinated garlic flowers
- 1 tbsp Dijon mustard
- 1 tsp Old Style whole grain mustard
- 1 tsp zaatar
- 1 tbsp cocoa powder
INSTRUCTIONS
- Cut the beef into small cubes and gind it in 2-3 batches in your food processor, on pulse, until it has the consistency of ground beef.
- Transfer meat to a large mixing bowl and add the rest of the ingredients.
- Mix until well combined, cover and refrigerate for a couple of hours, to allow mixture to firm up and flavors to blend.
- Form into 4 patties and cook on the grill or non-stick pan on medium high heat for about 4-5 minutes per side.
- Serve in hamburger bun with your favorite garnishes.
Did I mention I was also craving cheese? 
Hello there,
So sorry for your recent loss of your Dad, I lost mine thirty years ago.
I sincerely hope you find a way to cope and move forward.
I really enjoy your blog, and this burger has me salivating now, and it is only 3a.m.
Chin up and smiles,
Steven
Hey, thanks Steven! You’ve just made me quite proud! To have someone salivate over my food at 3 in the morning! Wow. Thanks, you’ve made my day!
Thanks for the kind words about my dad too! I appreciate!
Hey,
I wanted to tell you that your blog is amazing and it always inspires me to do better with food, in flavor and nutrition. I’m sorry to hear about your Loss and I couldn’t compare that experience. Hang in there and don’t feel ashamed for a weekend of sweetness goof-ups. You are only human!
Rawan
Thanks Rawan. That feels good to read. Knowing that I inspire people is what keeps me going! Good to know you are one of them! Thanks for letting me know. And thanks for the kind words. With the help of all of you, I will pull through (and ditch the ice cream!)
Hang in there Sonia! Forget about the guilt of browines and ice cream, they taste great and it’s ok to want to feel better, your heart and soul need healing. Plus the sugar probably kept you going as things got tough. Just keep on cookin’ those healthy meals; the nutritious food will feed your body in a way that will help you get back on track feeling better over all. You are doing a great job with this blog and I look forward to reading all of your great recipes.
Thanks Julie! Your kind words are truly appreciated! I will do my best to stay in the right track and keep writing great recipes. There are still thousands in my head, so I think you guys are stuck with me for a little while…
Hey! Just spotted this on Foodspotter – ten bucks says you’ll be getting a lot of traffic from there with this post! – and just thought I’d drop a comment to say that it looks absolutely DELICIOUS! I love people who aren’t scared to be a bit adventures when it comes to adding spices to their food as well, and I’ve never heard of anyone putting cocoa in a burger, but I bet it’s delicious. Will definitely be making something similar when I next get a burger craving – I say similar because I’m not sure I’d be able to get my hands on Zaatar, but based on what google tells me it is I will check my local ME shops.
Cheers for sharing!
Thanks, Mr. Bacon! I see you are a true bacon fanatic! To think it used to be my favorite! I would dream of eating an entire pound to myself, although I never dared actually doing it!!
Glad you like my burger. Don’t let the addition of zaatar discourage you from trying it though.. it’s not a real fancy ingredient that totally changes the outcome of the recipe! You can replace with oregano, a splash of lemon juice and sesame seeds, of just plain omit. Leave the cocoa powder though! It does add a lot of depth to the flavor of the meat. Not to mention the lovely dark color!
First off, your burger looks amazing (I want one NOW) and nice job on the fries
Sorry they took so long…I guess I start mine early and keep them in the oven when I am working on other components for my meal.
I am so sorry to hear you had a rough weekend, sending lots of love your way! I am a complete emotional eater too…just another thing we have in common! With all the stress and emotions you’ve had to go through lately, you deserve a little break and try not to feel guilty, I know the feeling of the “hangover” from food though
but as I remind myself, today is a new day with new meals – keep your head up! 
Thanks Nora! Don’t you feel bad about that fry thing, it’s not your fault that I keep ruining your recipe! I will get it right someday, you’ll see. I was a lot closer this time. I said it, third time’s the charm!
Thank you for all the love and kind words that you are sending my way! It really is helping a great deal!
This burger looks wonderful! I guess I’m so store-trained that I never thought about making my own ground beef. Definitely not a bad idea since it’s been recalled in our area due to an ecoli outbreak. Going to try your idea one day!
Don’t feel about about letting yourself have the comfort foods sometimes. I’m so sorry for your loss, and at those times we just need comforting food and friends and family. You’re normal on that one.
Thank you so much, that’s appreciated!
Grinding your own beef isn’t that complicated, and it’s so much better (not to mention LEANER!) If you ever give my recipe a try, tell me what you think!
Ah, I know what you mean lately. I am all about the comfort food lately. I’ve just been trying to make it as healthy as I can and eating a lot of fruit helps when all I want is sugar. But still. Don’t feel too bad, it was what you wanted at the time, now you can just move on and get back to eating well and making your body feel awesome again
That burger looks so yummy. I’ve actually been craving a good burger myself, which is saying a lot since I don’t usually crave meat. The cocoa powder sounds so interesting! Can you actually taste it? Or does it just add some flavor in the background of all the other flavors? And those fries look incredible too
Oh yay! Thanks Heidi! It’s good to know I’m not the only one! Mind you, at least, you’re sticking with fruits…
Funny, I used to be a hard core carnivore, a meal wasn’t a meal if there wasn’t a hefty serving of meat that came with it… and now, I hardly ever crave meat at all. I’ll have beef MAYBE once a month, perhaps even less than that. Pork? Never! It used to be my favorite, but I will try and stay away from it as much as I possibly can. Anyway, for some reason, I was really craving that burger and it really hit the spot. The cocoa powder, you don’t really taste, like you’re not gonna go and say “yikes, this tastes like chocolate”. It only adds depth to the flavor of the beef. Since top sirloin is a very lean cut of beef, it needs all the flavor it can get! So definitely a background thing!
Girl, let me say this – take time, don’t be hard on yourself and take time. do nothing, do whatever you need, feel, want to do. take your time. Dads are very special people.
Personally – that hamburger looks fabulous and so do the fries !!! we all need a good hamburger every once in a while, and ice cream for breakfast is OK ! I’m a RN at a children’s hospital and believe me – ice cream is OK for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks……..take care good person, you are a wonderful. we LOve you and love being in your life.
Awww, thank you so much Suzie, that feels so good to read! You are a true angel! Here, let me give you a great big hug!